


The Brady Bunch Doesn't Exist In Lima, Ohio

by lunarknightz



Category: Glee
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-29
Updated: 2010-08-29
Packaged: 2017-10-11 08:17:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/110313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunarknightz/pseuds/lunarknightz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set post-Theatricality, Finn's life just keeps on getting crazier. AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Brady Bunch Doesn't Exist In Lima, Ohio

As far as Finn can figure, when you get old, like his mom and Burt, you reach a point where you realize that you're old. Like really old, halfway to dead. And when you know that you don't have so much time to live left, that's when you start to cram everything into life that you can.

That's the only explanation that Finn has for the roller coaster that is the Hudson-Hummel family drama. Either that, or his mother, who for the sixteen years that he had known her was perfectly sane, had flown over the cuckoos desk.

Carole and Burt went from dating, to moving in to the Hummel's house (disaster!), breaking up when Burt threw Finn out of the house, making up when Finn showed up at the garage with his mom in tow (still wearing the red shower curtain Lady GaGa outfit), to going to therapy as a family (which strangely had helped), to eloping to Atlantic City over Memorial Day weekend, and buying a house together that was big enough for both teenagers to have their own room, plus a guest room.

After all of that, when they got home from school one day, his Mom was home, on the couch, holding a baby.

"Is it ours?" Finn said when he picked his chin up off the floor, which is stupid, because after everything with Quinn, he's done a lot of research on babies on Wikipedia, and it takes a lot longer to have a baby than his Mom had even been dating Burt.

"As wonderful as it is having you two boys", Finn's Mom says with a chuckle of delight, "We knew there was something missing from our family. We didn't expect things to happen this fast, but the adoption agency called this morning."

Burt was smiling. "Kurt, Finn. Meet your sister. Beth."

"Beth?" Finn shot a worried look over at Kurt. It couldn't be, could it? Certainly, there had to be millions of babies named Beth. In Lima, Ohio. Who were up for adoption. Right?

Kurt shrugged silently.

Finn moved closer to look at the baby. It was Beth. Quinn's Beth. Puck's Beth. The Beth that could have been his drizzle, but wasn't. He'd seen her in the hospital when the whole club visited Quinn.

Oh, this was way too close for comfort.

"That's great guys." He said with faked enthusiasm. "I need to lie down." He stumbled off to his room, and collapsed on his bed.

His life was a soap opera. And he hated doing laundry.

 

______________________

 

The Hudson-Hummel family adapted to their new family member pretty quickly. Most of them, anyway.

Carole and Burt were over the moon, taking Beth on walks, changing her diapers, and rocking her at sleep tonight. Kurt declared himself in charge of Beth's wardrobe (Finn was pretty sure that being at Babys-R-Us with his Mom and Kurt was the seventh circle of Hell. How many overalls could one family buy for a little bitty baby?).

Beth's adoption was an open adoption, for Puck and Quinn came over seemingly all the time to see her. As did most of the Glee Club. Which only got a little annoying.

Finn didn't hate Beth, but he kept his distance. She was a baby, and now, more than ever, Finn was sure that he'd be out of this house, out of Lima, in only a couple of years. This was just temporary. He'd go to college, and then he'd only have to deal with this crazy house in the summer and at Christmas.

Avoiding Beth worked for a while. Until his parents went on a date, and Kurt was on cold medicine that let him sleep through anything. Finn had to babysit, and of course, Beth had to cry.

He changed her diaper, but that didn't pacify her for long. So Finn walked the floor, read books in goofy voices (but he wasn't going to read to Beth- what Kurt usually did- The Cosmo Guide to Skin Care.) It was too late to call anyone, and wikipedia was of absolutely no help.

Beth wouldn't stop crying.

"You're a pain, you know that?" Finn told his little sister. "I didn't ask for this. I didn't ask for any of this. And I know that if things were different, and I really was your dad, instead of Puck, maybe I'd have a clue what to do right now, but I don't. Ask Kurt. I suck at being a brother. In general, I pretty much suck." He sighed. "And you know Beth, life is crazy. Things are really crazy. In what kind of world does somebody end up being a brother to a baby that was supposed to be their own? I used to just play football, and I liked it, and my mom was single, and I liked it. And they say that the world is going to hell more and more. Probably by the time you get to be my age, it'll rain toads or something."

Through her tears, Beth reached out and wrapped her tiny fingers around Finn's thumb. The gesture made Finn feel all kinds of funny inside.

"But it's okay, right? Because I'm your brother. And if it's raining toads, I would totally get you an umbrella. And Kurt, because he's your brother, too, would get you rain boots."

He'd heard his Mom singing to Beth sometimes before she put her to bed. And Finn flashed back to when he'd sang to Beth before, when he sang to her sonogram.

Now, Finn sang again, and he meant the words, in a different way than he had before. Beth wasn't his daughter, but she was his sister. And any dumbass that wanted to hurt her would have to go through him. He'd stand by Beth with every last breath he had.

Beth stopped crying, and if Wikipedia hadn't told him that baby smiles are just gas, Finn would swear she was grinning at him.

From that moment on, Beth was more than just his sister.

Beth was Finn's Drizzle.


End file.
